Today we celebrate the feast of the Holy Spirit ,also known as the feast of the Pentecost.
Celebrated 50 days after the Easter sunday, this feast commemorates the descent of the Holy Spirit on the Apostles of Jesus after his ascension into heaven.
I must admit here that the Holy Spirit is still more of a mystery to me. As a child I was taught that God consisted of a Holy triunion …..The father, the son and the holy Spirit. Human as I am I needed to relate everything with something I could see. So finally I saw the picture of the Holy Trinity ……
OK now the Father meant the old man I saw, Son was obviously Jesus Christ and the Holy Spirit……Oh it’s the dove right up there!. Fine ……I got it !…..the spirit was in the form of a bird 😁. So a bird it remained till I grew up and was preparing myself to receive the sacrament of confirmation.
As a child my family lived in a town where the parish was dedicated to the The Holy Spirit. While reciting the Apostles creed I had a belief that we were acknowledging the parish we belonged to. So it would be……”I believe in the Holy Spirit, the …….”. Later we migrated to our native village where the parish was dedicated to the Holy Trinity. For years I wondered why the necessary change in the Apostles creed was done to …….”I believe in the Holy Trinity the ….” . I understood later though 😀.
As a teen as we prepared ourselves to receive the sacrament of confirmation I learnt a little more about the Holy Spirit. I learnt that on confirming we would be bestowed with the 7 gifts of the Holy Spirit. The gifts included wisdom, understanding, counsel, fortitude, knowledge, piety and fear of God. I was excited and I looked forward to my confirmation, I surely wanted all the gifts but most of all…….Wisdom.
I imagined myself becoming a wise woman after my confirmation…..Imagined myself being the wise one who would never be confused between the right and wrong. But No, I am not a wise one till date……And No! I don’t blame the Holy Spirit for it.
The confirmation was no default mechanism to receive the gifts. It just made us eligible for receiving the gifts…….not worthy. It was our responsibility to make ourselves worthy to receive those gifts. I guess I am still nowhere close………but the quest is on.
There is a reference in the Bible that says that a sin committed against the Holy Spirit shall never pardoned……..this always makes me shudder in fear. The entire truth of the Holy Spirit has not yet assimilated in this tiny brain of mine. But as St. Augustine of Hippo said….
………I’ll hold on to my faith and believe….. Believe in something I still don’t understand nor see…..In the faith that someday I will understand and see what I believe in.
Have a blessed feast of the Pentecost. 😇